Trigun #5: Angel Arms Pioneer 75 minutes English/Japanese English Subtitles 11/21/2000

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Recently I discovered that Johnny Yong Bosch, while he WAS the Black Power Ranger, was not the Black Power Ranger. For reasons I can't entirely understand myself this disappoints me. I don't know why, but it just felt nice having the strong voice of 'Wade' or whatever his dorky name was to guide be through these things. Wasn't the Black Power Ranger's robot a wooly mammoth? That's stupid. If someone gave me a spandex outfit and a bunch of superpowers and a laser gun and then proceeded to give me a fucking ELEPHANT robot I'd kick their ass. But if someone were to grace me with the fifth disc of Trigun, well then...all bets are off. And were it to be, beyond my wildest dreams, the fifth volume of trigun with the limited edition chrome slip that I DIDN'T GET then I'd certainly be happy to run away to Vegas with them and get nice and hitched. I don't know what my obsession is with those little extras Pioneer so loved to give out back in the day, but I think it shares something with the reason why I only buy special editions even though I don't bother watching any of the extra features. I think I just like having the most complete version of something. Plus, I like how chrome is all shiny.

 

And I like chicks who wear eyepatches, though I prefer their attire to be -slightly- less mannish (a more feminine voice might help too). This chick might be a fine lady, but she's one hell of a stuck up bitch. Introducing herself as...somebody and she's the first Gung-Ho Gun and she's going to go about just making Vash's day all kinds of horrible. Vash outwits her, shoots the eyepatch off her face and just generally acts cool. But there's something I don't understand (ignoring the fact that she has an eye that controls your senses). If Vash shoots the eyepatch off, then wouldn't her eye just be fucking with him full time? That's pretty much how the disc goes. The first episode is filler, with Meryl and Milly being hired to protect an old couple from a bunch of jerks dead set on taking their tropical oasis paradise away from one of them. Again, something I really don't get. Why can their be a forest here and a desert everywhere else? Something about a power plant? Trigun uses complicated and misleading words through out the whole show and it's starting to get to me. Watching one of the earlier episodes on AdultSwim last week I realized that, at one point, Vash is pouring a forty on the curb for his dead homey, the power plant. I JUST realized this. After almost three years.

 

(Joel fucking loved this guy, until he shot his sword out like a rocket and his sheath turned into a gun. If you've ever played Soul Blade, then you know guns certainly are NOT honorable) And it goes on like that, with people approaching Vash and getting beaten by him, though he still refuses to kill. This is kind of moot now, why? Because it seems like just as he's walking off into the sunset someone else pounces out and busts a cap in her badguy's back while saying "Haha, now it's my time to get them!". I know this might be me trying to act a little precogniscent, but I assure you it's in the cards. What doesn't really make sense to me is how much people want this job when everyone else gets beaten, and then killed by THEM. So wouldn't you just assume that you're going to lose and someone is going to come along and kill you. This isn't the grossest mistake in anime history, but it's one I really don't like. It's just like an assembly line of bad guys killing other bad guys. So...I guess it's not THAT bad. And Trigun is pretty slick with the way Vash drags his gun along the ground during a role and its samurai people complaining about "twisted Christian magic".

 

So yeah, Trigun can be a bit confusing at times, and even though we're quickly moved into a 'monster of the week' formula now it's still pretty enjoyable to watch. I mean, what other show offers you a samurai and a Latino bowling ball in the same episode? While Bare might be quick to judge me about calling people Latino, I know this guy certainly is because he's got some sort of accent going on. Bare hates me because I'm convinced the white haired guy on X-Men Evolution is Mexican, even though Bare says he's like...German or Eastern European.. I think Bare's a retard, because the guy's name is Ignatio...or Martinez or something like that. That's not the point. E. G. Mine is a dirty Mexican and he gets what he deserves, a bullet to the head (Well, probably not, I can't entirely remember what happens to him). Trigun proves to us that both Mexicans and Japanese space samurai guys can die in the same town and it's okay. I don't know -why- the Japanese seem so dead-set on giving us that message, but I think it's a little weird how often they try to squeeze it into things. You want to know what the only thing I'm trying to squeeze in is? More Trigun. It's probably two years and some months too late for most of you, but get Trigun. It's pretty good.