Pokemon
#7 : Psychic Surprise!
Pioneer
60 minutes
English Dub only
07/20/1999
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Pokemon
Pioneer
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| Brock : For kids summer means playing on the beach, splashing around and having fun. But for me, summer means bathing suits and girls to wear them. |  |
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I don't think you can get garbage smell of your hands, because I've been trying. Yes, finally the week of me doing the jobs of ten Nigerians is over. Now, I don't want to sound racist or anything, I have plenty of black friends.** I'm not saying they're incompetent because they're Nigerian, they're incompetent because they're IDIOTS. But I never really noticed how much we don't need pretty much our entire kitchen staff, considering my boss and I have been handling almost the same amount of work with just the TWO of us, why do we have fifteen or so more people? I can't believe in a year of work I never noticed that they weren't aggrativingly useless, they're TOTALLY useless. There's a difference between being pissy and having me make half your sandwiches because you don't feel like doing your JOB and not even knowing what your job -is-. Technically I don't know what my job is, but that's because I've done every single one in this place three times, that includes posing as the manager/owner when the need comes. Yeah, but there's only a week left and then it's off to college for Dave. |
| I've always loved the next arc we're coming to in Pokemon. We're given the slow paced and kinda sappy story of the ghostly Maiden who's been waiting for her lover to return from war for two thousand years. The pokemon Ghastly poses as the Maiden every year during the summer festival to help the townspoeple remember her legend, and to attract ridiculous amount of guys. Brock and James both fall under the spell and nothing but special "stickers"*** will save them. We then get to see Misty's hair down. The humdrum (and excitement) passes, there's something about a Butterfree "season of lo-ove". Love is converted into two sylabbles because that way it sounds all sexual, which it is. Ash is told by Brock that Butterfree has to go across the ocean and "make some babies" with another Butterfree. Woah, that's pretty raw for a dub. Finally all that's over and we head off to Saffron city, and the Saffron city gym. |  |
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Pokemon Hot Girl #7 : The Ghost Of Maiden's
Peak
Forget it guys, you don't even have a chance. While she might have exquisite fanshion sense, mystery in spades, and a cute shock of purple hair, this girl is taken and she's not giving up on waiting for her lover. Besides the fact that she's a ghost, she's not gonna let you get anywhere near her chasteness. A virgin she's definetly and will remain so until her lover comes back for her and they're married up in heaven. Jessie provides her wonderful outlook on how she "hates girls like her, always waiting around for their man like there was nothing else in the world". The Ghost of Maiden's Peak might be cute, but it's kinda hard to feel-up a non-corporeal being.
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So Ash finally makes it to the gym on Saffron city, after a narrowly surving falling off a cliff while chasing after some ghostly little girl in the forest. Thank god he had his Bulbasaur slave to vine whip him to safety, then fan him with a giant leaf while feeding him grapes. Pokemon are our friends! Yeah, right. The Saffron's gym leader is Sabrina, as a character that SHOULD'VE been voiced by Mike Reynolds (seeing as how he looks just like the captain from Lily C.A.T.) and she's completely heartless. Saffron gym is the place where all the Russian accented people while psychic power practice bending spoons and trying to guess what's on the other side of giant playing cards. They come upon Sabrina herself finally, a cold and cruel trainer who is holding the little girl spotted earlier in the forest in her lap. She decides to have the cutest little pokemon named Abra fight her battle. Abra apparently sleeps eighteen hours a day, even DURING matches. Unfortunately for Ash's poor Pikachu, this isn't an easy fight because Abra quickly evolves into KADabra. Get it? Kadabra is my favorite pokemon, he's so cool and he says "KADABRA!" Kadabra makes me happy. Ash's Pikachu takes a sound thrashing and Mike Reynolds advises that they all leave and give up on getting the Marsh bage. However, not even a psychic "pantsing" can deter the ten year old pokemon trainer, as he says with his boxers exposed. There is a way the could possibly beat Sabrina...but they have to goto Lavender Town and try and find a Ghost pokemon. One wonders why didn't they just capture the Haunter two episodes ago... |
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***You know, the same kind of stickers that Japanese Shinto priestesses use...way to dumb everything down dub guys.