They Were Eleven

CPM

90 minutes
English/Japanese
English Subtitles
Released: 01/25/2005
Reviewed: 03/21/2006

Listen to Dave and Joel talk about this show! (right click, save as)

Anime in the eighties was a wholly different beast than what we understand as anime nowadays. Now we have silly things like love quintangles and ultimate techniques to deal with, whereas in the past you could be pretty safely assured that the main character only had one (max, two) girls lusting over him and he really only had one sweet move in his arsenal, like a hundred hit punch or a laser beam that shot out of his chest. All other things were merely tertiary to the main event, which generally ended in the bad guy's head exploding in a violent fashion, or something/someone turning into a giant blob and threatening to consume all of (Neo)Tokyo. Also there was usually radiation in large doses.

Now we either have to deal with complex plots, complex characters, and complex story threads from the likes of Paranoia Agent or we have to let ourselves succumb to the willful beasts of mass marketing and merchandising like Naruto and Inuyasha. Are either of those directions really preferable? They're different, sure, but are they really better?

Well Paranoia Agent is better, I can tell you that for sure. But that's sort of a black sheep in the anime family.
They Were Eleven sounded like just about the most perfect thing I could imagine. It was made in the 80s, so bonus points there, and it takes place wholly in space... double bonus points? It also vaunts a key concept in any good film: paranoia. Much like the book Ten Little Indians, which I keep referencing whenever I talk about this show because I haven't read any other books in the past ten years, the characters in They Were Eleven are trapped in a dangerous situation they can't escape and they know at least one person is actively working against them. Does the mere thought of that tickle your fancy? I tell you, it got me! And what's more if I had another fancy to be tickled then it'd get that one too. The very idea sends shivers down my spine! What kind of adventures will they get in? When will they realize that it was the judge and he faked his own death? Oh my oh my!

So the characters in They Were Eleven aren't really trapped in a situation they can't escape, but they might as well be. They're all finalists in the test to get into the space military, or something of that sort, and they have to stick around on a spaceship for a couple weeks and learn how to work together in perilous situations. The intimation is they can't leave. They have a 'panic button', but pressing it results in an automatic failure and if someone dies they'll fail the test (or at least be graded rather poorly). The idea is that they'll all learn how to work together under pressure. It's like a coming of age story. A space coming of age story! As I've discussed in the past, prefacing anything with the word 'space' makes it automatically better.
The wrench in the gears is that where there was originally supposed to be ten students on board the spaceship, there are now eleven. Nobody knows who the extra person is and he's sure as heck not talking. Even with the aid of the telepath, our main character Tada, they can't discern who's the hidden influence in their midst. As you might expect, things start to go wrong in a big way and trust basically goes down the tubes. The audience soon finds out that action is indeed in the cards.

The problem is things never go wrong enough. The viewer never feels like the characters in They Were Eleven are being put in situations more dangerous than scraping your knee or banging your head on a low hanging beam. Surgery is handed in what seems like a matter of seconds and even life threatening situations like exploding bombs don't always have enough gravity applied to them to ring true. The imbalance is prevalent in some portions of the movie, and it almost feels like the creators couldn't decide just how serious they wanted to make this dang thing. Some characters, like Tada, are proficient in three or four different things (surgery, electronics, mind reading) while the majority of the cast barely has time to utter a speaking line.

The result is a mostly disjointed, but still entertaining watch. I got it for $6 online, and compared to some of the stuff that costs $20 or $30 these days... I would've felt justified paying more. They Were Eleven is based on a good concept, in a good setting, with just enough action to keep you nice and interested. And it doesn't bother wasting your time with drawn out fight scenes or boobie-laced filler. If only they could find a way to keep it just a little more tense. Oh well, I guess it's better than Ninja Triple Action XX-Karate Fight.