Azumanga Daioh #1:
Entrance

125 minutes
English/Japanese
English Subtitles
Released: 04/27/2004
Reviewed: 06/07/2005

I have a very strange habit. When I come across some word or proper name that I can't pronounce (or can't be bothered to remember) I simply make up my own iteration of it and refuse to accept anything further. An erstwhile a good friend of mine, who pisses me off by not paying me utilities, once had a girlfriend by the name of Lynn Gyueson. Deciding that Gyueson was much too complicated a surname to remember, much less pronounce, I christened her Lynn Gaijin and left at that. Not only was it phonetic, it rhymed!

I can't say with any surety that Lynn was my initial foray into that bizarre aspect of my character, but it's what immediately springs to mind when I mention it.

Azumanga Daioh holds a special place it my heart through purely accidental causes. Not many months ago I frequently spent hours in or about Jerry's room while I waited for video to transfer off of my DV Tapes. My computer, which is from the land before "The Land Before Time", does not see fit to bless me with a firewire port. After awhile I had read every Magic: The Gathering card Jerry had within arm's reach and I turned my gaze to his respectable collection of graphic novels. Not being a fan of super heroes (Bat and Spider-related heroes exempted), I began to peruse the manga. My choices were limited to Azumanga Daioh or stuff by Ken "I eat butt" Akamastu. The choice was clear.

Azumanga Daioh was appealing to me as a manga because it was written in a four panel style reminiscent of any standard American comic strip. Emboldened by what might be the Japanese equivalent to my beloved Get Fuzzy (and really bored after hour three of tape transfer), I strode onward through the pages of volume one. I immediately took a shine to this lovable group of teenage misfits and their normal-though-crazy high school routines.

There are no super heroes in this storyline. None of the girls have super powers or the ability to speak to animals.** What's positively stunning about Azumanga is that it's so plain jane where anime is concerned. Nobody has a freaky cat ears or a tail (except the dog, but that's okay). There are no robot maids in Azumanga Daioh. I don't think there's even any maids, which is bragable when the main cast is something like 85% fifteen year old girls. The kind of laissez faire, everyday humor of the manga was a suitable way to pass the time while lounging in Jerry's room. A man can only defecate on his roommate's bed so many times, after all. Worrisome is the question: Would the anime translate nearly as well? How do you make a 26 episode TV show out of four panels of scribbles?

I guess Charlie Brown pulled off a few specials. How hard could it be? This past weekend Jerry flailed his arms and shouted to the heavens. While we watched K1 Karate Tournaments, played outdated Dreamcast shooters and I engaged in my masochistic tendencies with Final Fantasy Tactics the young man cursed me all the way.

Why would he do such a thing? Because Jerry made the mistake of reiterating a tongue twister from the show. "Basu Gasu Bakuhatsu" the child prodigy Chiyo exclaims, trying to show that she isn't good at everything. So too did I meander through various permutations of those very lines during the entire night. Eventually Joel suggested that we might actually watch Azumanga Daioh instead of just listening to me babble three words over and over again and I corrected him. The proper name of the show was "Basu Gasu. Basu Gasu Gasu Gasu." It sounds crazy, I know, but those Japanese will do anything for attention!

The girls of Azumanga Daioh inhabit a surreal -- yet realistic -- world. There's something unusual about the gluttonous, freeloading English teacher challenging her roommate/PE instructor to a swimming race during school hours, but at least they're not going to school in an underground bunker while SPACE MUTANTS attack them. And I just plain like shows where perverts are treated like perverts, not main characters. With tried and true characters like the teacher/lush and the space case transfer student it's difficult to see how you could lose! Azumanga Daioh knows that true humor lies not in panty shots and physical violence, but with impromptu nonsequiturs and an adorable Great Pyrenees named Mr. Tadamitsu.

Or Mister Tadakichi... I'm 90% certain I only made one of them up.