I know, you're doing what you always do when you read something I write, you're saying to yourself "Dave, hey, come on, how could you hate what is basically the only outlet for buying video games? Surely you don't intend to venture into the market of online game buying, where prices are of a similar nature and games end up costing more because of excessive shipping fees?" No, that's not what I'm saying at all. My problem with the purchase of video games through a retail outlet is a much more dastardly and clever enemy than something as mundane as low prices or poor selection. My foe is human in nature and, as we all well know of my generally misanthropic disposition, this can often understandably provide problems. |
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You know what I'm talking about, but just in case you're unsure I'll paint you a prettier (not exactly) picture. When I go into a store, generally I have an idea of what I want. I want X game, and I want to get out of there. Because of the circumstances surrounding buying a game in a B&M store, I no longer find this to be an enjoyable experience. I feel like a few years ago, when you needed assistance in a game store, the attendants would very gladly help you find your would-be purchase and then be on their merry way to eat their greasy McDonalds brunches or refuse to let you return something even though they were the exact same guy who sold you the broken merchandise in the first place! Sure, these were pitfalls, but at least the undesirable elements of the process generally kept to themselves, right?
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Well, what now? Maybe the game outlets I frequented when I was sixteen or seventeen were the last bastions of sanity in this insane market or maybe nostalgia has just clouded my vision, I don't know. Now retail gaming stores have turned into these micro-anime cons where people think that just because you share a certain interest its their right and privledge to talk to you about whatever they might desire. I basically understand the concept, as Joel so easily explained it to me last year. For some people with these kinds of hobbies, these places are like lightning rods. Galvanized by the idea that they're in an atmosphere where their hobby (or lifestyle, in the case of some) is not only accepted, but SHARED, they think that this translates into a god given right for them to talk about whatever they want to whomever they want. Look, it's not that a necessarily -dis-like people (yeah I do), but sometimes when I go to a store I just want to get my game and get out, I'm not trying to spend a half an hour listening to you babble on about crystals or bananas or medallions or whatever else you're collecting. Some of the blame certainly falls on me, because I've more than once opened the door for this kind of treatment. But can you blame me? If I ask whether or not Disgaea is going into moratorium how am I to know that this is going to turn into a fiften minute dissertation about your wife and her psychology classes? Did I ask for that? I find it hard to believe that most of the people working at these places even HAVE wives! |
If this comes across as an to broad or general an insult, I'm sorry, but there's just so many of these people out there that I've run into that I'm really getting tired of having to deal with it all. This isn't to say there aren't good people at these stores, or good people that play games (of course there is. You're lookin' at 'em). I just can't stand the idea that, like I said, these people expect you to subscribe to their philosophy just because you share a peripheral interest with them. Hooray. You know, lots of old people like golf, but I bet that three quarters of THEM don't feel the impassioned need to drag each other in every which way about pointless stuff when they're in the golf supply store. No, they just wear stupid hats and stupid pants and make tons of money as doctors and lawyers while the bands of social rejects that populate these places like moths to flames are sitting there and dying, just DYING, to tell people what their greatest score in Startropics is, other some other asinine fact. Here's a hint : You're not Danny Buckman (three times world Startropics champsionship winner) and if you're not Danny Buckman, then nobody cares about your Startropics score.
It's a harsh reality, I know, but it's the way it is. You know what almost pisses me off more? The customers. The associates, it's their job, so maybe some of them are just trying to build a rapport with you. It's a well known fact that the only things game store employees get comission on are warranties, discount cards and disc doctors. Those are tough sells, and maybe the think spending a few minutes babbling on about Final Fantasy XIII-7-Niner is gonna get them that extra dollar or two that they so desperately need (for more McDonalds) hash browns. The customers though. Once, Andrew, Bare and myself had the displeasure of standing in front of a guy and his girlfriend in a line. They must've weighed about four hundred pounds put together, which wouldn't have been so bad if the guy didn't comprise of a QUARTER of that total weight. To make matters worse, the girl has decided to eschew any self-respect or social mores in her way by wearing those ridiculous cat-ears pictured right. To make matters WORSE, they decide to defy social conventions yet -again- by making out rather noisy...in a public place. And not a public place like a -park- but a fucking VIDEO GAME STORE. If I wasn't there, I wouldn't believe it actually happened. But it did, the wounds in my tender eyes are proof enough of that. That's by far a worst-case scenario, but it does well to highlight the point that there's at least a small population of patrons out there who have all the decency and logical process of a fucking FLY.
So, soon I think I'm going to be officially tendering my resignation from the world of retail buying. There's Gamefly for your rental needs, and now Gamespot offers a discount to its members at a certain videogame website the day might be soon approaching where I'm going to need no social interaction whatsoever to pick up a videogame (not that I'd actually use it, but the option IS there). Some might argue that this is a bad thing for the fraction of society that gets 90% of their socilizing from this process, I would reply that you have to break a few eggs to make an omelette. While I might prefer some sort of robo-salesman programmed only to take my money in the realm of my videogame purchasing, until that day comes I guess I'm just going to have to take my lumps and bitch about it where nobody's going to read it. |
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