First of all I would like to thank everyone that came to the party that was thrown by Fan-service.com. It was a lot bigger than anyone thought, especially Andrew, but he agreed to eat a hat so I will not say anything.

Never would I have thought that 10 flyers for 4 hours would have done as much as it did (As I screamed many times whilst drunk off my ass, I am a marketing genius). But I have been wrong before. And I was wrong this time as well. The first person to show up was some guy that looked like he weighed 75 pounds. He stood next to the door with this terrified look on his face, asking to buy Rival Schools: Project Justice. Dave owned it, but did not want to sell it. After that was out of the way he proceeded to ask us what the “theme” of the party was. I was stunned, my entire world collapsed around me. I could be wrong but isn’t the “theme” of all parties beer? Have all these things I gone to at college been just a series of hollow farces called party in the hopes that anime dorks would show up so they could talk about how they were able the make an AMV out of Perfect Blue and Pokemon and why I should give a shit. But I digress. Beer and video games is plenty for me.

After that unpleasantness a few large black men showed up. It was obvious that they were expecting more than beer and video games. They mingled and had a few beers and soon left. Then IT came. The thing I feared most showed up. 40 years old, 250 pounds, Pikachu hanging from his belt, wearing a hiking backpack filled with shit. Listen, I’m glad that we got as many people as we did, and I know that beer and video games doesn’t make us the cool kids in school, and I know that this guy is probably going to read this, but you brought this on yourself. I will say only this, if I turn out like that when I’m that old, I won’t be responsible for my actions against myself. I know that I have a holier than thou perspective on this situation, but you would too if you saw him. Thankfully he left too. It was a unanimous decision to start screening the people at the door.

The party was off to a bad start, but help was on the way. After a few more beers, a group of guys showed up that were the pinnacle of the night. The only name I remember is Dee, I apologize to the others but they were part of the best part of the entire party. The Chu Chu Rocket Drinking Game. For those of you who haven’t played the game, which is all but two of you, I’ll explain the rules to you so you can play it. Step One: Learn how to play Chu Chu Rocket, I don’t have time to tell you. Step Two: Use beer, liquor will give you a coma (Step 2.5 : Make Dave use hard alcohol, or you will get nowhere). Step Three: Once a cat hits you base, pause the game and drink for two seconds. Step Four: When the question mark mouse comes up and it says Mouse Mania, you must scream Mouse Mania or drink for two seconds. Step Five: Survive. That’s all, best of three wins. These two guys are the only two guys that ever play four rounds. It’s usually a clean sweep, but these guys were fighters, nay warriors and didn’t know that meaning of the words “drunk off your ass”. The one guy couldn’t even stand when they left. They threw caution and their livers to the wind, rolled that dice of destiny, and big fucking hangover came up. But by god they won the third round (I don't think you guys realize what a landmark event this is. Nobody has EVER won a match when they play the Chu Chu Rocket Drinking Game against me. I probably shouldn't have started pulling punches in the 3rd round, but I always feel bad about hitting a guy with a cat and making them drink every three seconds).

Many more people showed up after and during the game. One guy came three times, Alberto, he just didn’t want to leave. Several people from North Jersey with a single bottle of Bud stick out in my mind, along with a random guy with two wine coolers. The window of the apartment opened out onto the roof. That was the place that people went out to smoke cigarettes. Once there were twelve people outside, security was close behind. Stern warning later, the roof was off limits and the place became crowded (Fond memories of throwing things off the roof of Park Towne Place came back to me at that point). There were twenty people in a room meant for ten so it was a little tight. A few twelve year olds came with a bottle of Steel Reserve and won a place in our hearts. We asked for no money for the beer but one guy found it in to his heart to give us a dollar, with was sweet at the time. Some guys also brought Pocky, Joel loved that stuff and I enjoyed it as well (I fucking hate Pocky, but those two guys were really pretty cool, from what I experienced of them...after twelve beers). One other group (I can’t remember who) brought a beer in a green bottle (I can’t remember what) (Heineken! It was Heineken dammit!). This is that part where the beer had taken full control so the rest is a big blur. 200 years good karma to all of those that gave us stuff, except the guy that gave us wine coolers, those are for ladies.

The night wouldn’t have been complete unless someone got lost in the wiles of Baltimore. That person was Jerry. Since we underestimated the number of patrons, we ran out of all forms of booze. Jerry and some others from the party volunteered to search for alcohol. Three hours later, he returned with no liquor, the point was moot since the party had already ended. But we were spun a tale of thievery, stealth, and total lack of plans, I’m sure that Jerry could tell it better so I will leave it to him (Just don't ask him to tell it when he's intoxicated, as all you'll hear about is the wallpaper painted like bookshelves and the world "piano" repeated like six hundred times).

Again, I would like to thank everyone that came to that party. You have really helped Fan-service.com (Only if they actually come to the site, which they won't). Next year will be even bigger so be sure to check around for the flyer and keep looking on Fan-service.com for articles and updates (Do I need to point out the inherent flaws in asking people to check the site that gets no hits ON the site that gets no hits?).