Index / Cooking
  Week Sixteen: Remember... How to Make This Burger!


8 pounds of ground beef
4 cubs soft bread crumbs
2 medium sized onions (chopped fine)
4 eggs
2 cups Worcestershire sauce
4 cases of beer (for drinking)
This movie


Pirate Face or Tetanus? You decide!

My ability to take action shots? Awesome.

As Joel's erstwhile fiance said, the hardest part about these burgers is pronouncing the word "Worcestershire", but she also said that the only time she'd be in the same room with a Filipino is if he was cutting her grass or cleaning her pool, so I'm not really sure what to think of all that.

After you've exposed your racial proclivities to the world basically all you have to do is lump all the ingredients and mix them until they're fairly well blended. Then you simply slap them on the grill, get sufficiently drunk enough that you forget there were burgers at all and start a fire because you really shouldn't be using a propane grill on a fire escape.

Which is sort of how WE make burgers. You, however, are probably a little more industrious. In which case you could probably baste the burgers with worcestershire while they're cooking. This will probably make for a tasty burger, but won't be as funny as when I poured beer all over them and ended up extinguishing the grill.

It's really your call.

That is a horrible, horrible face.

Probably not as bad as this one, though.

There's something moving in those bushes!!
W-What is that? Is it some kind of monster? Is it Gamera? Is it the Chupacabra?
No, it's just Ben! And he's wishing you all a happy Memorial Day!

The Master Chefs want YOUR cooking suggestions. Send them to